Reviewing the Parenting Plan Changes Nothing — Unless You Know This

You Signed a Parenting Plan, But You Want Things to Change

At the time, you made agreements about the children. Primary residence with the mother, alternating weeks with you. Neatly recorded in a parenting plan, including a clause stating that you would evaluate it together every year. Now the children are older, you want more involvement, and you wonder: since we evaluate annually anyway, can I now change what's agreed?

The Arnhem-Leeuwarden Court of Appeal gave a clear answer on 5 June 2025: no, that's not how it works.

What Happened?

Parents had signed a parenting plan at the end of 2021. The children (born in 2010 and 2013) lived primarily with the mother; the father had them every other week from Thursday to Monday. The plan also included an evaluation clause: parents would review the plan annually and adjust it where necessary.

However, the father wanted substantially more: he asked the court to change one child's primary residence to him and to establish a more extensive contact arrangement. His main argument: he wanted a more meaningful role in his children's lives and felt he was being sidelined compared to the mother. He also claimed the children were caught in a loyalty conflict.

Both the district court and, on appeal, the court of appeal rejected his request.

What Did the Court Rule?

The core of the decision comes down to one legal requirement: a change of primary residence or contact arrangement is only possible if there has been a relevant change of circumstances and the child's interests require it (Article 1:253a jo. 1:377e of the Dutch Civil Code).

The father had not demonstrated this. His wish to be more involved is understandable, but it is not a legally relevant change of circumstances. The situation was not materially different from when the parenting plan was signed.

Regarding the loyalty conflict, the court ruled that the father had not sufficiently substantiated this claim. The mother had disputed it, and the father had not provided concrete facts to support it.

And the evaluation clause in the parenting plan? That makes no difference. Annual evaluation is a useful tool for conversation, but it is not an automatic trigger to revise agreements. Only if that evaluation shows the arrangement is no longer in the children's interests, and that can be factually demonstrated, can adjustment be considered.

Three Lessons from This Ruling

1. If you want change, you have to prove it.

The court does not go along with feelings or wishes. Anyone requesting a change must provide concrete facts and circumstances showing that the situation has materially changed since the plan was made. Think of: a move, change of school, serious concerns about the other parent's upbringing, or changed needs of the child.

2. Wanting more involvement is not a legal ground.

A father who says “I want a more meaningful role” expresses a very human desire. But for the court, this is not a ground to overturn an existing arrangement. The arrangement must work for the children, not feel ideal for the parent.

3. An evaluation clause in the parenting plan is not a wildcard.

Many parenting plans contain an evaluation clause. Parents sometimes think this gives them the right to put everything up for debate annually. That is a misunderstanding. The clause invites dialogue, it does not require adjustment and gives the court no extra basis to intervene.

What If You Do Have a Good Reason?

If there are genuine changes in your situation or the children's, make your case strongly:

• Document the changed circumstances as concretely as possible (school reports, medical information, statements from third parties).
• Seek legal advice early, a primary residence dispute is emotionally and financially demanding.
• Try to reach agreement through negotiation or mediation first. The court values it when parents have genuinely tried.
• Involve the children in an age-appropriate way, the court attaches great importance to the child's voice, especially for older children.

What Should You Do Now?

Do you feel the current arrangement no longer fits, for you or your children? The first step is not a court case, but an honest conversation: with the other parent, a mediator, or a lawyer who can help you assess whether your situation genuinely provides grounds for a request to modify. Because if you want change, you have to be able to prove it.

Case Reference

This post is based on ECLI:NL:GHARL:2025:3452.